Sunday, November 6, 2011

What is Envy?


            Think back to when you were in elementary school.  Did one of your friends ever get a new toy you wanted before you?  Being envious of another is an emotion that is hard to shake off when you see something you desire so strongly.  According to Miriam-Webster, the definition of envy is “painful or resentful awareness of an advantage enjoyed by another joined with a desire to possess the same advantage.”  A selfish wanting takes priority over other thought processes.  When one is content with their life, and want nothing more, then they are envious of nothing.  Envy is the selfish desire for what one doesn’t or can’t have because his or her life feels unfulfilled.
            The word envy roots from around the 10th century, and was a derivative of the Latin word “invidia.”  From there, Old French in the 13th century referred to it as “envie.” The emotion of envy has been around since the dawn of man.  The Bible states that humans “must not fall into the trap of envying of the wicked who seem to have a happy and untroubled life, but… God will reward each according to his deeds.”  The lust for what another owns is not what one truly wants, it is what he or she thinks will make them happy because someone else finds pleasure in the same thing.  As this quote states, all have different needs, and envy hinders man from seeing what will truly satisfy him.  If man knew what he truly wanted and how to get it, then envy would not exist. The opposite of being envious is being pleased.  When a friend gets a better grade than you, you might be proud of them, but subconsciously you feel resentful towards them for achieving a goal you were both striving for.  That’s what envy is; it’s not a feeling that’s easy to overcome, it’s involuntarily thinking of oneself first.  The only limitations of envy’s capabilities are that it’s an emotion that’s nearly impossible to control, and cannot bring happiness to those who are subjected to it.  If one is envious of another, then he or she is not pleased with them self, and seeks what others find pleasurable.  Being envious is a sign that one is not contented with his or her life, and is in search of the missing piece.
            Warning signs of envy can either be noticeable or subtle to the subject and receiver.  In smaller doses, envy can appear to be a form of flattery, like emulating small behaviors or looks.  Although this seems like a positive reflection of a friendship, it shows that the person emulating is lost and doesn’t know what they want, so they try to copy others who have the traits they admire, thus losing their identity of who they are.  In larger doses, being envious of someone is seen as being competitive or angry towards them.  Once this happens, the green-eyed monster takes over, and unleashes the subject’s insecurities upon those with their desired traits.  It’s a unique feeling because it masks true feelings of selfishness, low self-confidence, anger, and unhappiness.  When one cannot find what is worth living for, they look to others for inspiration, but act upon the motivation it in a selfish way that is not their own.  Instead of rejoicing in a friend’s achievement, and working towards it as well, an envious person will simply contemplate why their friend deserved it more than his or herself.  Jealousy and envy are often used interchangeably because they both concern the possession of something, and are selfish.  The difference is that jealousy is the fear of losing the affection or connection that one has with something.  Envy is the strong desire for what one has, but the subject isn’t concerned about losing anyone or anything, they are only concerned about their goal.  Jealousy is focused on the fear of losing the receiver’s attention, while envy makes the subject feel like they’re competing with the receiver.
            Envy’s affects can either be positive or negative, depending on how envious the subject is of another person.  If one is envious of one’s talent, it can motivate them to work for that skill.  If a teenager sees their idol playing a guitar, it can inspire them to take up music lessons.  This type of envy can be seen as a driving force to help someone define him or herself.  When presented in more unobtainable situations, it conveys a strong sense of dissatisfaction with one's life and a strong sense of possessiveness and materialism.  By trying to achieve what others did, one might go overboard, by stealing or prioritizing his or her interests above others.  Envy can only be a positive force if it’s used as help to motivate, but most of the time, envy selfishly consumes the mind and people lose sight of what they truly need and yearn.
            Envy will always be present in humans, to desire is something all humans face in order to progress in society.  Once selfish thoughts are eliminated from the human mind, then envy will be no longer.  Once one discovers who they are, the want for what they don’t have will vanish.  The fascination and desire of the unobtainable blocks the path to true happiness; humans think they need what others have.  Everyone is different, and what pleases one does not please all.  Looking more in depth at this emotion has given me the insight that I should always be myself because it’s the only source of true happiness.  Trying to be anything but you will reinforce a lack of self-confidence, which is something everyone needs to achieve anything in life.

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